The New New Cactus and Reed Show

The New New Cactus and Reed Show is an entertainment themed talk show based in New York City.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

The End of an Era

To all Friends of the Cactus and Reed Show,

Sadly, the Cactus and Reed Show has run its course, and must be cancelled. We thank you all for your support and hope that you will continue to watch Willis on his new show, "On The Road With Willis."

However, you can take some of the show with you for you to enjoy forever! Please participate in our Celebrity Guest Auction! All proceeds will go to buying drinks at Dan's going away party on Thursday. If you were not aware of it, Dan has been known as "The Father of the Cactus and Reed Show," and was the creator of the original show at its old home.

You may bid on your favorite guest from now until Thursday at 3pm. Please stop by the cube to make your bid and view the guests, or leave a comment with your name and bid. All of the past guests are on display at this site.

Thank you for your support.

The Cactus and Reed Show.

Monday, February 12, 2007

Willis in Boca

This weekend, Willis took time out for some much needed R and R in Boca with one of our producers.

Youngest known FOTCAR, Allison, is really excited to meet Little Willis


Willis chats up a few pawns.


Finally it is time to catch some rays by the pool.


It soon becomes clear that Willis cannot swim, and he is a bit top heavy.


Willis drys off.


CHECKMATE!


Little Willis ponders the mystery of life. Did it really begin in the sea? Did I get sand in my uniform? Do we really have to go home?

Wednesday, February 7, 2007


It's 4:12 New York, do you know where your talk show is? It's the New New Cactus and Reed Show, with Witchblade actress, Yancy Butler, Peyton Manning, and Kiefer Sutherland.

Today the Cactus and Reed Show welcomed Yancy Butler, star of the cancelled TV show Witchblade. We would like to reassure viewers that she is in no way indicative of the type of guests we will continue to have at the New New Cactus and Reed Show. One of our producers saw her at a Mets game last year and promised to have her on. That's it.

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Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Tuesday, February 6, 2007


It's 4:12 New York...do you know where your talk show is? Today's guests on the New New Cactus and Reed Show, Gilette and Hicks, the new owners of the Liverpool football club, Peyton Manning, Mike Ditka, and Muhammad Ali.
Today we welcome the new American owners of one of England's most revered football clubs, Liverpool. The Amercians bought the club after a failed attempt by Dubai oil barons. Now Liverpool can look forward to ownership by Hicks, a fervent Bush supporter and Gilette, the owner of one of the largest factory farms in the world, responsible for countless acts of animal cruelty and untold amounts of pollution. Congratulations Liverpool fans!

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Monday, February 5, 2007


It's 4:12, time for the New New Cactus and Reed Show with Eli Manning's competent older brother and Super Bowl MVP Peyton Manning, grumpy Mike Ditka, and Jack Bauer.

Today on the New New Cactus and Reed Show we welcome Peyton Manning who can finally throw that monkey off of his back after turning in a not-terrible performance in the Super Bowl. Manning is glad that now he will no longer have to endure the endless Dan Marino comparisions, and that he can finally sell his current car, a 1999 Ford Taurus since the Super Bowl MVP wins a new Cadillac. Just what someone who makes 8 figures a year needs....a free car!!

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Friday, February 2, 2007




Live from New York, it's the New New Cactus and Reed Show. Now they ain't here to start no trouble, please welcome, the 1985 Chicago Bears, Mike Ditka, and Padma Lakshmi.

In advance of Sunday's Super Bowl XLI, featuring the 2007 Chicago Bears, today on the New New Cactus and Reed Show, it's the rapping and dancing 1985 Chicago Bears. Who could ever forget the vocal stylings of Mike Singletary or the dance moves of bad boy quarterback Jim McMahon? The Super Bowl Shuffle will always remain one of the finest moments in NFL musical history. Joining the Bears is their teddy bear of a coach, Mr. Mike Ditka, telling all of our fans they're #1.

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Saturday, February 03, 2007

C + R Happy Hour Number Two



The Director of Booking and the Artistic Director with Willis at the Blue Bar at the Algonquin Hotel. Here we hoped to meet up with one of the Cactus and Reed Show's most beloved guests, New York's oldest bartender, Wong Hoy.



Unfortunately, it was Wong Hoy's night off but the bartender was fantastic and even posed for a photo with Willis. Willis was slightly offended however when the bartender held him at arm's length and proclaimed "Oooooh a little doll!" before the photo.



One of our newest FOTCARS (Fans of the Cactus and Reed Show) poses with Willis.




After the Algonquin, the C + R Happy Hour moved to Cellar Bar where Willis danced the night away. Here Willis poses with one of our producers and a faithful FOTCAR.




Two of our most loyal FOTCARS with Willis at Cellar Bar.



Here a HOTCAR (Hater of the Cactus and Reed Show) tries to drown Willis with a beer. Security was called and the HOTCAR was escorted back to Connecticut but the trauma was too much for Willis...the party broke up soon after that.

Thanks to all the FOTCARS and one HOTCAR for making the New New Cactus and Reed Show Happy Number Two a fantastic success. Fake Television Forever!!




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Wednesday, January 24, 2007



Live from New York, it's the show so nice, they named it thrice, it's the New New Cactus and Reed Show. Today's guest...from Heroes, Hiro Nakamura, Kiefer Sutherland, and at 6'9 from Louisiana, Willis Reed.
Today's guest, Hiro Nakamura, is the star of the hit TV show, Heroes. Hiro is portrayed by Masi Oka who also played a philosophy student in the first season of Gilmore Girls. The show has been such a huge success for NBC that they have already anounced spinoffs for next season: Heroes, Miami and Heroes, Los Angeles.

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Friday, January 19, 2007


Live from New York, it's the New New Cactus and Reed Show with tonight's guest, Mrs. Salman Rushdie, Padma Lakshmi, Kiefer Sutherland, and Wong Hoy.

Tonight on the Cactus and Reed Show, we welcome former model and current host of TV's hit reality show, Top Chef, Padma Lakshmi. Padma has been oft-criticized for her lack of actual food knowledge and her regular pot smoking, but frankly, no one can look as good tasting Ilan's already-ran Spanish dishes or pout as well eating Marcel's foams as Padma can. She is also terrific at saying "Kenmore Pro Kitchen."

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Friday, January 19, 2007

Thursday, January 18, 2007


Live from New York, the show so nice, they named it thrice, it's the New New Cactus and Reed Show with today's guest, Muhammad Ali, standing over a defeated Sonny Liston who had famously knocked out Floyd Patterson in 1964, Kiefer Sutherland, and at 6'9 from Lousiana, Willis Reed.
Today in honor of his 65th birthday the New New Cactus and Reed Show would like to welcome a barely living legend, Muhammad Ali. In recent years, Ali, beset by Parkinson's Disease has been turned by the American media into an American folk hero. Despite the fact that were he at the height of his career today, he would probably be vilified for his brashness and outspoken manner, today he is looked upon by many as a symbol of America. This image was mainly born out of Ali's lighting of the torch at the 1996 Summer Olympics in Atlanta, GA. The New New Cactus and Reed Show would like to wish Mr. Ali a Happy Birthday and all the best in the future.

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Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Beep, beep, beep beep.....the following takes place between 4:12:00 pm and 4:12:30 pm...

Today on the New New Cactus and Reed Show, it's the star of 24, Kiefer Sutherland, James Brown, and generic actor guy.

The New New Cactus and Reed show was proud to welcome today Kiefer Sutherland, star of the hit action drama, 24 which chronicles a day in the life of CTU Special Agent Jack Bauer. Having recently been released from a Chinese prison, Jack must now stop a terrorist cell in the U.S. from detonating nuclear weapons all over the U.S. Already in the first four hours of his day, Jack has been tortured, killed a man with a vampire bite, and shot one of his best friends in the neck at close range. After all of that, we wait on the edge of our seats to see what will unfold in the next twenty hours...if we don't lose interest before then....

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Friday, January 5, 2007



(whisper) Today, on a very special Cactus and Reed, it's the hardest working man in show business, the newly departed Godfather of Soul, James Brown.
On a very special Cactus and Reed today we welcomed the recently deceased but not yet forgotten James Brown. The Godfather of Soul truely was a music legend, as evidenced by the thousands of people who lined the streets of Harlem to watch his body pass by in a white carriage with plexiglass sides, drawn by a team of white horses. He will be missed.

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Thursday, January 18, 2007

Thursday, January 4, 2007



Today on the New New Cactus and Reed Show, it's CSI scene stealer, Adam Rodriguez.

As a special favor to our Social Director and Director of MySpace, The New New Cactus and Reed Show today welcomed Adam Rodriguez, a high school classmate of our social director. Adam has appeared on almost every incarnation of the CSI franchise. He can often be seen in the background holding objects up to the light or even using a pipette to transfer liquid from one container to another. The Social Director says she remembers that Adam was always good at science in high school, so this acting gig is perfect for him.

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Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Holiday Travels- Willis in Louisiana

During the holidays Middle Willis traveled also. After a 21 drive Willis made it down to the Deep South, namely Louisiana.



Willis's first stop...Baton Rouge, Louisiana where he visited the campus of Louisiana State University and especially enjoyed Tiger Stadium



Willis then traveled down to Lafayette where he posed with Director of Booking and her husband in front of the Christmas tree




Willis also found time to enjoy some authentic Louisiana cuisine, boiled crawfish, followed by a cup of the best coffee on earth, Louisiana's own Community Coffee.



Willis's final stop was in the Director's hometown of Centerville




Here Willis can be seen at the one stoplight in town



Willis enjoyed another traditional Louisiana dish, chicken and sausage gumbo

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